Almost 7 months since finishing chemo,
nearly 5 months since surgery,
and over a month since the last radiation.
These views in my rearview gain increasing distance and time moves happily forward and I feel myself entering in this new space of “life after cancer.”
I remember the long dark days of chemo, the sinking of my heart and my body and the sense that this time would never pass. I could hardly see any light in the distance on some of those days.
And I stand here now, in the light of those days ahead, knowing: THEY COME! We do round that bend, and that spacious place we read about does become ours to step in to.
“He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me” (psalm 18:19).
As I walk each day in the gift of this moving forward, my heart and mind also swirl with words and a passion to share this incredible chapter with its lessons and dark hard and highs and lows and forever imprint on who I am and where I’m going.
Slowly, the words are coming.
And the learning, it continues to unfold. Listening better to my body, following its cues (like, rest! when anemia just hit, rest! Oh, this one pushes against my instinct and inclination but continues to be the very needed thing), figuring out the best way to support healing now and what foods make the best sense for me and what rhythms now resonate … I sense this will be a lifetime of learning.
And it can feel overwhelmig but also, it feels very much ALIVE.